Chuck Norris counted to infinity ... Twice.
Godzilla is a Japanese rendition of Chuck Norris' first visit to Tokyo.
Chuck Norris doesn't sleep, he waits.
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.
Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn. He dares it to grow.
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his father did.
Chuck Norris once had sex on top of a semi-truck and one of his sperm got loose and fell into the engine. the truck is know known as Optimus Prime.
When Bruce Banner gets angry, he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets angry, he turns into guess who... Chuck Norris.
If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck has more money than you.
If Jesus can walk on water, then Chuck Norris can swim on land.
When the boogeyman goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris does push ups..he doest push his self up..he pushes the earth down.
Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Chuck Norris lives in Oklahoma.
Chuck Norris once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!".
Guns don't kill people. Chuck Norris does.
