Its been a while since i blogged. Actually something has been bothering my mind lately. Forgive me for the lame and depressing posts of me being a brokenhearted. As you see i broke up, to many peoples surprise indeed. And now look at me? like every other blogger in existence i will post this in a matter that at some point that i wish that she would read it.
But lately i have come to realized, that maybe learning to love is learning to let go. No matter how hard the pain can be. Its a tough realization, but none the less i have to face. If her own happiness is truly more important than my own.
Maybe i am in the 5th and final stage of grief,
I really wish i am. Acceptance, but on the other hand. i really wish i didn't have to accept anything
except her old lines like "the weirder you are the better", "ill never get bored of you", and my personal favorite "you are stuck with me whether you like it or not"
I am though stuck with the feeling of happiness i yet to let go. I am sure, that i've never been that happy.
Now i have to face that.. maybe space is what she needs. Because its actually my fault i lost her. I am so possessive, and she is... well like me. She is a rebel. I have brought this upon myself. If i actually want her to be happy i would have to let go, at least for now. Maybe if i do, one day ill be able to see her put a smile on her face again. Something i am not capable of doing anymore.
Ill just end this post with words i promised her, if they still hold any means
"I love you adella, ur the one thing i would never ever ever want to lose"
